It is very good if both you and your soul mate have more or less the same ideas about family and everyday life. But still, sometimes newlyweds miss important details that can affect their future family life.
It’s a good idea to discuss these issues with your soul mate before the wedding, and, if necessary, find a compromise so as not to cloud your honeymoon and life together.
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Many people get married hoping that their partner will change: they think that he will hang out with his friends less, stop drinking, find a better job, learn to plan a budget, etc. But unspoken hopes are dangerous for a relationship!
Uncover them before you get married. Perhaps the partner himself wants to change. Besides this, it is worth remembering that people are very reluctant to change their habits, and sometimes they never change at all. In that case, think about whether you can accept your partner as he is.
This talk will channel your hopes in a constructive direction.
It is important to talk about how you both will distribute your family money, to determine the main expenses and funds that need to be postponed. Typically, young families fight most about money, so you should dot the “I’s” and cross the “T’s” in this delicate question. No one likes neither wasteful people nor curmudgeons; so try to strike a balance between these two habits.
But keep in mind that you have to resolve this issue in a businesslike manner, with a cool head. Start by discussing your wedding budget: first, calculate how much each guest will cost. And show each other how much money you spend on your share of guests, and how much on your partner’s guests.
If your partner’s sexual needs seem to be different from yours, don’t turn a blind eye to it. Perhaps you hope that after the wedding, everything will work itself out.
But it’s a big mistake, and it’s better to figure it out. If you think that you have a sort of sexual incompatibility, in the future, when you’ll have children and more responsibilities, these issues will become more difficult to solve.
A place for living
Mortgage and home purchase are a very important topic since it is a place where you both will live and raise your children.
Sit down and discuss what area you want to live in, what type of housing you both want to buy, what size of an apartment/house you need — discuss everything, down to the amount of light in the rooms and the type of interior, and then determine, how much it all will cost.
At the beginning of a relationship, it often happens that a man wants to postpone having babies a little. And, as a rule, when a woman gets married, she immediately starts thinking about it.
To avoid disagreements, discuss this issue in advance and marry only when both of you are ready to wait or want to have a child as soon as possible. It is equally important to talk about how you will share youк responsibility of taking care of a baby.
Determine who is responsible for doing repairs, buying groceries, cleaning, washing the dishes, looking after the children, doing homework with them, and picking them up from kindergarten. You need to discuss these things before marriage. And you have to find the solution that will fit you both; this way? You will avoid lots of serious problems in the future.